You need to genuinely desire the goals you set. If you don't
like your job and don't want to be there, then it is difficult
to be committed. It's also crucial that you believe that you
can achieve the goals you set for yourself.
Stress and Goal Setting
Goals create striving which results in more stress. So how
do you deal with this stress? Since I am notoriously poor
at pacing myself, I created a structure to help me with this
process. My plan includes eating a healthy diet and exercising
regularly, but also not scheduling clients on Fridays. I never
work past 8 p.m. I plan vacations and weekends away, and schedule
social events with friends at least once per week. Part of
my stress management program also involves not over-booking
myself with social activities so that I have time to retreat
for rest and recuperation.
As I approached graduation from college many years ago, I
wrote a poem about goal setting which I titled, "My Brook
and I."
I remember the brook streaming though the woods; spending
hours around it, building forts, wiping the mud off me with
skunk cabbage.
I remember the brook on sunny days; Water babbling over stones
and rocks, pieces of wood; making the water ripple the way
it did.
I wondered what happened to the brook traveling away from
my yard. I had a goal for my brook to flow to the ocean...but
then what?
I see goals for myself thwarted, rearranged, fulfilled. But
the goal for my brook; What happened to it?
Deepak Chopra, in The Seven Spiritual Laws of Success, says
that if we want to have a successful career, we should first
center ourselves and then release our intentions (our career
goals) to the universe. We should not be attached to the
way these goals develop, or to the exact outcome, but leave
the details to the universe. We can get the same results through
effort and trying, he says, but the result is stress, which
can lead to heart attacks and other physical illnesses.
Sometimes we focus more on our unhappiness with our present
situation, than on what we want to achieve. Chopra says that
we should accept where we are now, be fully present in the
moment and concentrate on our deepest intentions (goals).
Goals should be difficult, but achievable with persistent
effort. Goals that are too extreme, such as doubling your
income in one year, can only discourage you. Goals work because
you persist and focus your efforts in a specific direction.
Without that direction, we can find ourselves floating through
our lives, more at the mercy of outside forces that are not
devoted to our welfare or success. But we can manage our goals
in a way that does not create undo stress by not being attached
to the exact way they are achieved.
Having set goals the brook and I build toward them. The brook
unable to know... about a pipe in the ground, a seeping marsh,
a dam. Myself not knowing the course I will follow. Knowing
what I want, yet finding it hard to grasp.
I remember years of competition, of struggle, of acceptance.
Then discovering what is real, important; myself, my friends,
expression; a soft kitten purring on my lap; peace.
Being more than a doctor, a lawyer. Knowing comfort, relaxation.
Being myself.
Approaching the completion of one goal, I set new ones. But
fulfilling them means going away, sorrow. Like the brook moves
on, streams to the river... the ocean. Saying goodbye to familiar
things, friends. Facing a reoccurrence of similar past memories,
painful.
Conclusion
In my business I set performance goals for myself every year.
I also set goals for relationships, finances, home, physical
and mental health, as well as spiritual development. I can
attest to the fact that the more specific the goal, and the
more frequently I review that goal and focus on it, the more
likely I am to meet that goal. It helps to write down your
goals, read through them periodically, visualize them and
keep a picture journal that represents the achievement of
those goals. But it also helps to listen to the feedback from
the universe, and make adjustments to those goals when necessary.
We should have a career plan, but be flexible with how it
unfolds.
I know a word...self-fulfillment. Being vulnerable, can I
take chances? Being strong, grinding ahead through disappointments.
Being weak, letting go of crippled goals. Like a brook who
misses the river, finding another happiness.
Being motivated, seeking what I am after, But not too aggressive.
Being easy, tension-free.
Making it through the insecurity Like cool water in a brook;
not knowing what will come. Traveling through the seasons
of time. Molding myself to the environment like the brook
makes its path through nature. Sliding over any obstacles
the brook continues over rocks, pieces of wood. Freezing in
the rough, cold spots; melting in the warm. Praying for a
map free of dams to follow in a steady, unchartered progression.
My brook and I.